Confusing Signs

I am always amused by signs that have grammatical errors in them. This is the same part of my brain that is entertained by graffiti in bathrooms. People have things to say or convey, but sometimes it just doesn't come off that way.

With this one, I washed my hands and then had NO idea what to do with the paper towel.



I had to read it a couple of times to make sure I read it correctly. I ended up just air drying my hands so as not to break the rules.

From management. Thank you.

Jamba Lance

Sometimes you learn more about people when things are taken away from you. No, this isn't a heavy entry, this is about Lance and his drink ordering habits.

So I was in the mood for a drink the other day that was more than water, but not quite a soda pop. I didn't want a McDonald's Frappe (which are pretty good) and didn't want to feed into "the man" and get a Starbucks anything. I finally settled on a Jamba Juice.

I went with a non-traditional favorite - Aloha Pineapple. I never get a free boost in my Jamba because the last time I got a boost, the powder didn't mix for some reason and I found myself inhaling about a teaspoon of "energy" powder through my straw. That was probably back in 2005. I was sitting there waiting for my drink and was looking at the boosts available and realized that they have changed. The one boost that Lance would always get was missing. However, his Jamba classic was still there -- Peach Pleasure. I immediately sent him a text to let him know that his deadly combo of drink and boost were no longer available to which he responded, "pearls are now clutched." I mean, leave it to Lance to think it is funny to have him go up to the counter, in Oakland and order a "Peach Pleasure with Femme Boost." The look on the people's faces were priceless. So much that I often thought that I should try that trick down here just to see what the reaction would be. But then I decided that it's not worth inhaling more powder just so I can get a reaction from someone and maybe boost up my estrogen levels.

I left the Juice with my Aloha Pineapple (which was pretty good) and thought that Lance should write to Jamba Juice to rally a cry to bring back his Femme needs (and maybe they'd send him a coupon for a free drink as a consolation). But when I told him, he informed me that his consolation has been found at the local Sonic that has since re-opened in Kingsburg. My argument was that he will no longer be boosted with lady powder. His argument was the he gets a cherry with every drink and that it means more to him to "discover innocence lost via a found cherry than it is to have Jamba." Touche Mr. Chabolla.

I guess the moral of the story is that sometimes by doing away with things that are comfortable, you can find things that are equally as, if not more, reassuring -- even if it comes in the form of a cherry.